Estimated reading time: 3 minutes

Composition writing may be something new for lower primary students but many of them are able to write well given proper guidance. Primary 1 and 2 students are like clean slates. They learn from the beginning, step by step and thus are able to lay a proper foundation in sentence structure, basic punctuation and grammar.

Here is a piece of composition written by one of our Primary 2 students. Enjoy!

A Kind Deed

“Beep!” The green pedestrian light was beeping loudly.  Many pedestrians trotted hurriedly across the road like a troop of soldiers.  Nobody seemed to notice a frail old lady standing at the side of the road. The lady’s grey hair was tied up in a bun.  Her face was lined with wrinkles and her skin was peppered with age-spots.  In one hand, she was holding a walking stick and her steps were slow and unsteady.  In the other, she was holding a few bags of groceries.

Tom was on his way back home.  As he was about to cross the road, he noticed this frail old lady.  “May I offer you a hand?” asked Tom kindly.  Crowfeet appeared on the side of her eyes as she nodded in appreciation and thanked Tom profusely.  Without hesitation, Tom took over the shopping bags from the old lady.  She heaved a sigh of relief.  He held up his hands to stop the cars from moving.  Together, they walked across the road safely.  Tom accompanied the old lady all the way back to her flat.  She was very grateful for his kind deed.

Tom was happy that he helped someone in need.  He told himself that he would help the needy whenever he could.  He was in high spirits the whole day!

~ By Ulysse Wong (Primary 2)

This piece of composition is well-written because of a few reasons:

1. A variety of sentence beginnings.

Most lower primary students begin their sentences with a noun or pronoun. In this piece, this student was able to begin many of her sentences with words that are not nouns or pronouns, thus making her composition an enjoyable read.

2. Appropriate use of vivid verbs.

A number of vivid verbs were used to describe the characters’ actions clearly – such as ‘trotted’ and ‘accompanied’. These help readers to visualise the actions of the characters vividly.

3. Clear descriptions of feelings.

The characters’ feelings were clearly described in this story too. Descriptions of feelings help to make the composition more engaging and interesting.

4. Great descriptions of character.

Character descriptions is a more advanced writing technique. However, this Primary 2 student was able to describe the old lady vividly, with a great range of vocabulary. Lower primary students’ story characters are usually flat but the old lady in this story is definitely not.

If your child is in Primary 1 or 2 and wants to develop his or her composition writing skills, enrol in our Junior Writing Academy, an online composition writing course specially designed for lower primary students.

Click here to read more model compositions written by our students.


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7 thoughts on “Model Composition – A Kind Deed

  1. wow,I like the expressions well puncuated and grammmaticaly correct sentences

    Posted on 19th June 2020 at 10:07 pm
    1. Indeed!

      Posted on 20th June 2020 at 11:43 am
  2. nice compo

    Posted on 27th June 2020 at 1:23 pm
  3. it is good that you know how to write this


    Posted on 7th September 2020 at 9:49 pm
  4. It is actually good for a P2 like you…

    Posted on 29th September 2020 at 6:03 pm
  5. I find it hard to believe a P2 wrote this.
    That can be interpreted as either a praise for the author or distrust in this site. Do P2’s even know what crowfeet are?

    Posted on 14th January 2021 at 9:52 pm
    1. Hi Jane,

      Thank you for leaving us your comments.

      We only published authentic works of our students and Ulysse was a student from our Junior Writing Academy online course.

      Having marked hundreds of compositions submitted by students every year, we do get to see both ends of the spectrum on students’ work. With that, it should come as no surprise when we do get a good composition piece that stands out from time to time.

      Posted on 15th January 2021 at 9:29 am